I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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