His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Randomize