so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
he just fucked me for my cheese..
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
