you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
