I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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