The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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