physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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