Don't you send me to vm
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
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