was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Randomize
