no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
