you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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