Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
