I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
