Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
BRING THE BAGELS
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
