Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
