Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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