i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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