at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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