halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
You may now shotgun with the bride
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
