'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize