i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize