You can't special order awesome
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
