the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
