Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
