grandma shit on top of the toilet
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
