sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
