I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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