Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Randomize