I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
