All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
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