How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Randomize
