i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Randomize
