ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Randomize
