she looked like the before picture.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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