please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
