I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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