: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
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