6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
