they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
