I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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