i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Randomize
