Whod you bang
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
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