And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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