this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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