i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Randomize
