we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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