Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
My dick has a subreddit
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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