the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
