He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
