Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
