I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
